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The Letters of Katherine Mansfield: Volume I

Cholesbury — Summer 1913 —

Summer 1913

To J. M. Murry

Yes, Friday will be fun. I am beginning to ‘pretend’ that you are a sailor—trading with all sorts of savages from Monday until Friday and that The Blue Review is your schooner and Secker the Fish Eyed Pilot. Could you not write a long—complicated—extremely—insulting—symbolical—serial round that idea with minute, obscene descriptions of the savage tribes …? Thank you for Pa's letter. He was cheerful and poetic, but very loving. I feel towards my Pa-man like a little girl. I want to jump and stamp on his chest and cry “You've got to love me.” When he says he does, I feel quite confident that God is on my side.

It is raining again to-day, and last night the wind howled and I gloomed and shivered, and heard locks being filed and ladders balanced against windows and footsteps padding upstairs … all the old properties jigged in the old way. I'm a lion all day, darling, but with the last point of daylight I begin to turn into a lamb and by page 2 midnight—mon Dieu! by midnight the whole world has turned into a butcher!